Being shy about expressing what you want and need does no one any harm, except to yourself, and does no one any good, including yourself.
And most of the time, no one is really ever paying any attention, so what’s the point of hiding?
There is none.
I just might make this guide to adulthood a mandatory read for new students under the age of 30. I like the way the writer (or writers) hammer the points about not wearing our emotions on our sleeves and stop telling lies. Those are two very common issues, so common in most men that we made them part of the 4 Rules of Professional Pickup.
They’re very simple.
- No Lies.
- No Negativity.
- Be Courageous.
- Take Responsibility (for all your social interactions)
The Vice article makes a very simple point about lying, “Be honest with yourself, and with others, simply because it is more efficient.”
We have all experienced what it’s like to talk to a pushy salesperson.
They have something they need to sell us and we are not interested in buying. Our internal alarms go up as if to say, “here we go again with some aggressive sales tactic.” They’re doing their best to convince us by explaining all the great features we could have for the price.
They ask us questions about our interests, probing for a way to relate and befriend us. They think if they can just establish a quick friendship with us, it will be harder for us to not make the purchase. The longer we are in the discussion, the more it feels like an obligation to engage, and the more we want to run away.
The tension and awkwardness only escalates the harder they try.
So, how is that so many Washington DC men think that selling themselves is part of some dating process?
Asking strangers questions is not polite, it’s rude.
The other day I was at the airport waiting to catch my flight back to Washington DC and I had the great displeasure of watching a train wreck happen. There was an older gentlemen trying to get the attention of a younger woman.
Age differences aside, the painful conversation went a little like this:
We all know being in a position of leadership is an attractive quality to have, but do we really know what it takes to earn it?
It takes a daily march of persistence with your goals in mind, regardless of your position in life. There are no natural born leaders, there are just people that persist in the face of adversity when all others have given up. If you can take the pain the longest, you will end up in first place.
Did you do any of these things today…
“Recent research in clinical psychology has shown that the fastest way to change an emotion is to change the behavior attached to it.”- Dr. Noam Shpancer, Action Creates Emotion, Psychology Today.
As Dr. Sphancer’s article reminds us, taking action leads your emotional center. So taking responsibility for your social life is a critical component to being a well balanced adult. Sitting around waiting until you “feel like” being talkative is just not going to happen. You have to take the action first.
Frankly, you should consider yourself lucky.
As dating coaches in the Washington DC area, one of the most frequently asked questions we get from women is why do so many men use text messaging to ask them out? Many women lament that getting asked out over the phone seems to be a dying art in the digital age. Men are asking women over text, email, Facebook,
Guys, you want to know what I tell them?
There’s always a bit of fear that goes into approaching women. From the moment you see who you want, your reptilian part of your brain starts to fire off all kinds of reasons why you should preserve your ego from getting bruised.
“She’s out of my league.”
“She’s talking to someone.”
“She must be with that guy.”
“She saw me look at her but she didn’t smile back.”
“She’s too _______.”
The typical advice is not to think so much and just go talk to her. Everyone has heard of the “three second” rule by now. And yet, if that solves the problem, why does it continue to affect so many guys?
Wonder why you are getting the same results week after week?
I was thinking to myself today regarding what really needs to happen for someone to get good at dating. What do you think it is?
When you go out and get the same results is it your fault or theirs? Read more
I’m not as interested in what you wear or say as much as I am in what you DO. I’ve seen plenty of guys go out and buy the latest designer threads, only to fail miserably at approaching women due to… not approaching women.
The only true failure is the failure of not doing anything.
As many of you know, an article by Ernesto was published in the American edition of Cosmopolitan back in their February issue. Cosmo decided to take the international option and had our article published in all of their foreign magazines!
Be sure to look through our site and see what we’re all about.
For all press or service related questions, contact us at firstname.lastname@example.org
You can’t touch it, you can’t see it, you can’t smell it, but you can definitely feel it when “it’s on”. It’s not the notes themselves, but the actually the spaces between the notes of a song that can make or break a performance at the Kennedy Center. That’s tension. That’s what’s already naturally there between men and women.
A lot of guys I know, in their attempts to be a more dominant, more alpha-male, more cocky funny, or more whatever, fail to recognize that most of the time, less IS more. You don’t have to talk as much as you think you do. You don’t have to be domineering as much as you think you do, as long as you can become a master of tension.
Our 4 and 2 week courses, start this Thursday. Be sure not to miss it and sign up today!